Discussing Healthy, Wealthy Families with Danielle York of 21/64 Philanthropies

By Ariel Kurland, Jewish Teen Foundations Program Associate

This month’s Philanthropic Education Webinar and Seminar focused on creating Healthy, Wealthy Families. Danielle York from 21/64 Philanthropies led an engaging and informative discussion on this important topic that many of us can relate to. As the seminar began, we sat at a table and were asked to reflect on a number of family memories: Who do we think of when we think of family? Was money discussed at home? Who did we go to for support? What was our first job? How were gifts received in our family? What did we do when we received money? Did we spend it? Save it? Donate it? As Danielle asked us these questions, we closed our eyes to help recover and remember some of these memories. After a few minutes of reflection, we came together as a group and got the chance to share our thoughts.

What struck me was how personal these memories surrounding money were! I thought back to my childhood and realized money was never really discussed at home. Although both my parents were doctors, I have many memories of my parents arguing about money. I remembered when I got my first job, and how great it felt to have money to spend on the things I wanted. I remembered that the year I had my Bat Mitzvah, my class collected several thousand dollars to donate to nonprofits around the country. Even though we never discussed money directly, messages surrounding money were constantly in the background.

After we had gotten the chance to share some of our positive and negative memories, York set the stage for the rest of the session,telling us that “with that sense of who we are and where we have come from, we can be more intentional about the children that we are raising, the families that we are helping to grow, and the experiences we are fostering for others.”

Throughout the session, York focused on five indicators of success for healthy, wealthy families. I explain each point below, and frame each point through a Jewish lens.

1. Values: B’tzelem Elohim… in G-d’s image. We are all created in G-d’s image.

   York opened the seminar by telling us: “What we are teaches the child more than what we say. So, we must be what we want our children to become.” There are two types of values: aspirational values (I want to be a runner, but I don’t run) and operational values (I am an independent, strong thinker). Strong, healthy families are those that spend time illuminating operational values for each individual within the family. It is important to not only discuss the values you want to embody, but to actually participate in these actions that help you uphold the values you want to live by.

2. Connections: L’dor v’dor… from generation to generation
   

   “We are hardwired for connections- mothers and fathers know this. It is visceral,” York explained. “We are animals that are designed to be connected to other people. Without authentic connection, there is suffering.” With connections, comes the need to show vulnerability. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable shows your ability to take risks and challenges. While embracing vulnerability can be risky, it is necessary that we teach our children and grandchildren the importance of vulnerability. By showing them examples of your own vulnerability, it will encourage children to feel ready to take on their own challenges.

3. Motivation: “It is not up to you to finish the task, and you are not free to abstain from it.” -Pirke Avoth Ch.2
   

   Motivation is a huge factor in healthy families. York tells us: “The desire to get better and better at something matters. Fostering mastery is encouraging your children to find what it is that they are good at and letting them work hard to achieve success here.” York shared three major components to motivation, as outlined by Dan Pink. First is autonomy- we must let our children have a full sense of personal choice. It allows them to think about risks, failures, and successes for themselves. Although it may be difficult at times to fully let go and let our children be independent, it is a very important factor in being motivated. Second component is purpose.  We must teach our children that the work they are doing—whether donating money, holding a job at a company, or going to college—are all efforts towards something greater than themselves. Knowing that our work and our money go to something bigger than us is so impactful. Mastery is the final component to motivation. It is important that we foster a growth mindset- one that pushes our children to find something that they feel motivated by and one that inspires effort, rather than success or failure. Remind them that no great act was achieved without someone taking a risk.

4. Skill Building: “Anyone who does not teach their child a skill or profession may be regarded as teaching their child to rob.”  –Talmud, Kiddushin 29a
   

   We must teach our children the skills they need to be successful in who they are and what they do, particularly when it comes to dealing with money. York referenced a client of hers who shared this quote: “A pool, like money, can be really dangerous without skills. But a pool, like money, can be really powerful and lovely and rich with opportunity and joy.” We can’t expect our children will know what to do with money, if we don’t teach them how to use it first. Much of these skills can be taught by sharing our own personal experiences. Teach children how to tolerate discomfort by telling them about hard times your family faced. Teach your children about financial fluency by asking them to help budget your next vacation. Lastly, teach them about developing a worldview by exposing them to a variety of settings outside of your own home

5. Practices/Rituals: “This too shall pass.”
   

   As this Jewish proverb says, it is important to remember that moments will continue to pass us by. It is important to remember and celebrate the good moments regularly to remind yourself and your family how blessed they truly are. York quotes Sean Aker who said “Only 10% of happiness is based on the reality of what really happened. The other 90% is based on how your brain processes the external world”. No matter what type of family you come from, or who makes up the members of your family, it is so important to celebrate the little moments. Make sure to teach your children about gratitude and joy, because it is something that we can lose sight of so quickly. There will inevitably be good and bad times with any family, and in order to keep strong, the family must keep these practices of joy in place in order to help uplift the individuals that make up the family.

Join us for our next Webinar and Seminar on Tuesday, June 11: Who is At-Risk in Our Own Backyard? Understanding and helping local vulnerable populations

To RSVP, or learn more about Philanthropic Education and our Webinar/Seminar series, contact Sue Schwartzman at 415.512.6259.

Israel Impact Grant Initiative Committee Visits Grantees

By Steve Ganz, Israel IGI member

It is often said we must think globally and act locally.  As a member of the Israel Impact Grant Initiative (Israel IGI), I had an opportunity to help people and organizations who are trying to make local change – local to Israel.  These organizations are called “social ventures” – ventures that undertake to make social change.  Working with troubled youth, enhancing social movements and/or enabling non-profits to have the resources to succeed in achieving their mission are just a few examples of the missions of such ventures.  I was given this rare opportunity to help make a difference and truly a difference was made – both in helping these groups and in me.

Steve, far left, and the rest of the Israel IGI members

Our institutional partner in Israel is the Israel Venture Network (IVN). IVN is an impact investment organization, creating sustainable social change in Israel through breakthrough social enterprise programs and venture philanthropy. In addition to financial investment in these ventures, IVN provides mentorship to help these groups succeed in making social change.  Our IGI Committee read through many proposals for funding and we researched these ventures to understand who they are and what they do.

A student practicing glass work at Susan’s House

Reading about what these groups do cannot compare to actually seeing and meeting the people they work with. For example, when we were visiting one venture – Susan’s House in Jerusalem – we had the opportunity to meet with graduates of the program.  One of the project’s main goals is to offer at-risk youth basic skills while encouraging them to return to a normative life style. These are kids who when entering the program see no hope in their futures. However, one young man we met just finished three years in the military. He now has a job waiting for him and an exciting future ahead.  Alongside this graduate was a young man who just finished the program.  “It was time,” he said, “to move on.”  Susan’s House helped him find direction, but he learned that he needed to forge the path ahead on his own.

Other groups we funded looked at more than providing individual service.  Jobs4Moms is a group that is trying to make a fundamental change in fabric of Israeli society.  It is structurally difficult to spend time with your child while at the same time work the expected long hours of professional/executive jobs.  The leaders of this venture are working with companies to create jobs that allow for flexibility to work and still be an attentive parent.

The IGI group met with amazing individuals in Israel who have dedicated their lives to seeing and fulfilling change in Israel. From the north in Haifa, all the way down to the Gaza, the groups we met with have a specific mission they wish to follow.  I am only glad I was part of a group that was dedicated and diligent in their efforts to help make a difference.

Learn more about all four of the Israel IGI grantees.  For more information on the Israel IGI contact Siggy Rubinson at 415.512.6429.

Announcing the Inaugural Israel Impact Grants Initiative Grantees

Two years ago, the Jewish Community Federation (JCF) launched an ambitious pilot to revolutionize its grant making efforts. Known as the Impact Grants Initiative (IGI), this new model adopted a venture philanthropy approach that offered high engagement opportunities for previously unaffiliated local donors and lay leaders while identifying high performing nonprofits that can make significant impact on local Jewish communities.

The concept of venture philanthropy, which combines theories and techniques used in venture capital strategies and business with philanthropic practice, provides a platform to highly engage donors and make strategic and tactical community investments. Typically, venture philanthropies focus on capacity building grants, instead of providing support for direct service delivery or general operations. They also provide funding as multi-year grants.

In January of this year, the IGI approach was adopted for an innovative partnership with the Israel Venture Network (IVN) to engage people in our local community in a unique collaboration with Israeli colleagues to identify and co-fund high performing social ventures in Israel.  The team is made up of a diverse group of talented and thoughtful individuals including business owners, non-profit leaders, and  high-tech entrepreneurs who spent months learning about Israel’s social issues and trends as well as the emerging field of social impact investment. This IGI culminated in a week-long trip to Israel to visit the seven enterprises under consideration and to make the final funding decision.

IGI team in decision-making mode

The team ultimately decided to fund three high-impact enterprises with the possibility of a fourth:

Susan’s House employs youth at risk in the production and sale of unique glass, jewelry and housewares.  This venture is run by a member of the ultra-orthodox community, who mentors and guides his program participants to develop self-esteem, communal values, interpersonal relationships and job skills.

Mitam provides a variety of human resource services to non-profits in a sector in Israel that typically lacks the knowledge and financial capacity to hire full-time HR professionals.

Jobs4Moms is an online job search platform geared toward mothers seeking quality full and part-time jobs that have the flexibility necessary to combine parenting and a career that utilizes their skills and experience.

Pending: Rakea aims to revolutionize academic studies for young Ultra-Orthodox students by weaving Torah studies into math textbooks. Typically, these students forgo the core studies in math, science and English for exclusively Jewish texts, and leave behind an education that’s critical for employment outside the yeshiva.

Not only did this experience yield three exceptionally effective  new Federation grantees representing an important and emerging sector in Israel, it also built and cemented bonds among the IGI team and created new relationships between the team and Federation.

For more information on the Israel Impact Grants Initiative, contact Siggy Rubinson at 415.512.6429.

Announcing the recipient of the Lloyd W. Dinkelspiel Award for Young Leadership

Each year we honor a recipient of the Lloyd W. Dinkelspiel Award for Young Leadership. Recipients are consistent leaders in our Federation volunteer community, have great potential for future leadership, and are 40 years old or younger. Please join us in congratulating this year’s recipient, Brett Goldstein.

Brett Goldstein

Brett Goldstein was born, raised and lived on the east coast until moving to San Francisco in ’03.  He began his engagement with the SFJCF in 2006 on the Tel Aviv One mission to Israel.  Since then, he has actively served as a lay leader in many different capacities throughout the Jewish community.  Currently, he serves on the JCF’s Executive Allocation Committee, as well as the Leadership Development Committee.  Brett is very proud to have helped re-establish the Fed-Fellows program this past year.  He participated on the first IGI committee and maintains an active role as a liaison with one of the agencies funded through the initiative (G-dcast).  Prior to his current JCF roles, Brett spent 3 years on the YAD board and as a member of the executive committee where he chaired the annual campaign.  In addition, he spent 3 years working on the Educating & Engaging Commission, as well as a Finance sub-committee that worked closely with struggling grantee agencies.  He currently serves on the board of the San Francisco Hillel on their executive committee and is the 2013/2014 incoming board President.

Brett was married to his best friend Marisa in July 2010. They have a 2-year-old daughter, Billie, and a 10-month-old son, Simon.  Marisa and Brett were married in New Jersey and their ceremony happened to be officiated by 2009 Dinkelspiel award winner Kevin Waldman.

Congratulations to the 2013 Helen Diller Family Awardees for Excellence in Jewish Education

The Helen Diller Family Excellence in Jewish Education Award announced its 12th year awardees in four categories.  The winners receive a $10,000 cash prize and $2,500 for their institutions.  The Helen Diller Family has chosen to honor exceptional teachers in Jewish education because outstanding teachers encourage youth to explore the rich traditions of the Jewish heritage, to incorporate Jewish values into their own lives, to help build Jewish community, and to take responsibility for the common destiny of the Jewish people.

Congratulations to the 2013 Awardees:

Congregational/Community School: Day Schildkret, Congregation Rodef Sholom

Day is a Jewish educator, director, artist, rites of passage specialist, musician, youth mentor, author, healer, ritualist and upright human being. He brings over a decade of visionary leadership and experience to the Jewish supplemental educational world having worked as a Jewish educator at over 15 Jewish schools on both coasts. In addition to his Fire Circle program at Rodef Sholom, he currently serves as the Director of the Tri-Valley/Tri-Cities Midrasha in Pleasanton. Day has also launched a new business this year, Humbled & Thriving: A spiritual mentoring program for young adults ages 15-30 (humbledandthriving.com). Day holds a B.A in Political Science and Judaic Studies from Binghamton University, and has attended the International Program at Hebrew University in Jerusalem. He has been trained at the The Art of Mentoring Program with Jon Young, Tama-Do: The Academy of Sound, Color and Movement in Switzerland as well as the Art Student League of New York. He dedicates this award to his father’s memory, to Claire Mikowski and the Fire Circle crew, and to all the good work that reconnects.

Day School: Renee Fine, Yavneh Day School

It wasn’t exactly the most direct route that Renee Fine took to becoming a long term General Studies/Judaic teacher at Yavneh Day School in Los Gatos, CA. Until the first of her five children were born, Renee worked as a social worker, counseling victims of violent crime up. After spending the next few years as a stay-at-home mom, Renee quickly became involved with her children’s classrooms at the Addison Penzak Jewish Community Center. What begun as volunteer work eventually lead to a job teaching their Mommy and Me class. This in turn led to becoming the Judaica Specialist for the JCC Pre-school. After 7 wonderfully enriching years at the JCC, and as her children moved on to Yavneh Day School, it became apparent that her following them to Yavneh was a natural progression. Thus started what, to date, has been an incredible 15 year tenure serving as a 2^nd, 5^th, and currently 4^th grade general studies and Judaica teacher. Her biggest joy in teaching has always been in the creating of meaningful connections by integrating General Studies with Judaica, and vice versa. Outside of the classroom, Renee and her husband of 30 years, Howard, enjoy watching their 5, now adult children, move through college and life. 3 of their sons have served in combat units of the IDF, so the family has been back and forth to Israel many times. Home for Renee can mean many things; home with her family, home with her Beth David community (where the family have been long time members), home in Israel, and home with her Yavneh students and colleagues.

Early Childhood Education: Silvia Gitlin, T’enna Preschool

Being Jewish and having been born in Mexico City defines who Silvia is, and, coupled with her love for children and education, motivates her work and community involvement. Silvia Gitlin is currently a Master Teacher in T’enna Preschool in the 4-year-old classroom. She strives to fuel the hearts and imaginations of her students through a comprehensive curriculum that intertwines Jewish values and traditions into her student’s daily lives, while meeting their emotional and developmental needs. Silvia is also adjunct faculty at Foothill College, were she has been teaching parenting skills and healthy habits classes in both English and Spanish to low-income parents. Her 16 years of experience in the field of education has also included teaching both ESL and Spanish in the Palo Alto and Mountain View School District as well as teaching Kindergarten through 4th grade at Gideon Hausner Jewish Day School. Silvia’s true passion is in the classroom, teaching children the love of learning and the importance of passing on the same Jewish values and traditions that she was once taught.

Informal Education: Kenny Kahn, Be’chol Lashon Camp

Kenny Kahn is a 30-year old Jewish, African-American East Bay Area native who currently works as a high school English teacher and head football coach at his alma mater, El Cerrito High School, and is the co-director of Camp Be’Chol Lashon (In Every Tongue). Kenny earned both his bachelor’s degree in Literature/Creative Writing: Poetry and master’s degree in Education with an emphasis in teaching  single-subject  English/Language Arts from the University of California, Santa Cruz. In the 2012-13 academic year, Kenny has been awarded ‘Coach of the Week’ by the Oakland Raiders, ‘Hero in the Classroom’ by the San Francisco 49ers, and was honored by the Jewish Sports Hall of Fame of Northern California with the ‘Golden Bagel’ award.

For further information or questions about the Helen Diller Family Awards for Excellence in Jewish Education, please contact Carrie Sullivan at CarrieS@sfjcf.org or 415.512.6226.

Peer Tutoring Program Helps Struggling Elementary School Students

By Isabel-Duarte Gray, Program Assistant, Jewish Community Relations Council (JCRC)

Every Tuesday morning, 33 Gideon Hausner 8^th graders pile into parent carpools and ride to Theuerkauf Elementary School in Mountain View, where they spend the morning building the literacy skills of K-3^rd grade students. In their assigned classrooms, the teen tutors work one-on-one with the younger students, wander the classroom providing help as needed, or sometimes lead groups to enhance their tutees’ reading skills through cooperative exercises. “As I read with them, I try to use techniques that I remember from when I was younger that helped me learn to read,” says Lucy, an 8^th grader taking part in the peer-tutoring program. “For me, what is most important is that I want them to know that I love reading too, and that I am helping with it not because I was sent to, but because I want them to develop the same love of reading that I have.”

Peer Tutors at Palo Alto’s Gideon Hausner Jewish Day School strengthen the reading skills of younger students at Mountain View’s Theuerkauf Elementary School.

Tzedakah. Tikkun Olam. Gemilut Chasadim.

Seven years ago, coordinator Ora Gittelson-David was tasked with constructing a program to teach these crucial Jewish values to 7^th and 8^th graders at Gideon Hausner Jewish Day School as part of the Avodah La’Olam - Work for the World Program. “As a former social worker, I was searching for a meaningful volunteer program that would enable our students to develop a significant ongoing relationship,” Ora explained. Then a parent told her about a tutoring program in which she and her son had participated over the summer with the Jewish Coalition for Literacy, which brought them face-to-face with students in underserved schools to share the joy of reading. JCL’s peer tutoring work perfectly fit the bill and Ora knew she had found her model: “The connection with JCL was made, and the rest is history.”

Each week, after they return to Gideon Hausner, the peer tutors discuss their classroom experience and often distill those thoughts into written assignments. “I am deeply touched by my students’ ability to reflect upon what they have seen going on in a classroom in which they are tutoring, being open to learn about issues based on what they have seen, and reflecting upon their own contribution to a young child’s learning,” says Ora. The value of peer tutoring lies not only in the individual service it provides to struggling elementary school students, but also in the lesson it reinforces in its tutors about the value of community service.

“The fact that our school is able to set aside time during our school day on a regular basis for our students to give of themselves to others speaks volumes to our students in terms of understanding the value of Tikkun Olam and the piece of our mission that speaks to community responsibility.”

When students, parents, and teachers work together to better the world, everyone benefits.

The Jewish Coalition for Literacy’s partnership with Gideon Hausner Day School is one of six programs JCL has guided and trained throughout the Bay Area since 2008.  While the Jewish Community High School of the Bay sends high school tutors into San Francisco public schools twice a week in collaboration with The Village Project, Oakland Hebrew Day School’s 8th graders tutor at Greenleaf Elementary School in Oakland, and Contra Costa Jewish Day School 5th graders serve as “Big Buddies” to students at Fair Oaks Elementary School in Pleasant Hill. All have received crucial training from the Jewish Coalition for Literacy.  JCL’s programs have earned rave responses from students, teachers, and parents alike.  This spring, JCL received a grant from the South Bay Jewish Teen Philanthropy Board to facilitate this extraordinary work, in addition to funding from an anonymous donor in the East Bay.

JCL’s Literacy Trainer, Barbara Pearl, prepares 5th grade Peer Tutors at Contra Costa Jewish Day School for their work in the classroom.

Back at Gideon Hausner, the Avodah La’Olam Theuerkauf Mentoring Program is rooted in two basic Jewish values: the love of learning and the mitzvah to better the world through acts of loving kindness.  Some of the most powerful feedback Ora Gittelson-David has received from her program is praise from parents of Gideon Hausner students, who are grateful for the lessons their students have learned about the diversity of their community and the fundamental importance of literacy. “Our students gain an understanding of the fact that there is a large community out there, one that is in very close geographic proximity, that can benefit from the skills they have learned and from their willingness to give to others,” Ora explains.

But Ora doesn’t need to explain – her students can beautifully articulate the value of this program for themselves. As Moriah, another Gideon Hausner Peer Tutor, puts it: “Education is an important Jewish value, and I know that I am not only educating them now, but I am also giving them the opportunity to continue their education further in their lives, because they have been given the skills to strengthen their reading.”

Become a JCL tutor: Register for a free tutor training workshop at www.jclread.org.

The Jewish Coalition for Literacy is funded in part by a $95,000 JCF annual grant and is a joint project of Jewish Community Relations Council and the Jewish Community Federation and Endowment Fund.

Developing Jewish Leaders Overseas

By Susie Sorkin

Judit (R) and Susie (L)

I want to introduce you to Judit – this beautiful young woman in the picture. Judit is a vibrant Jewish leader in Budapest. She was a very young child when the Soviet Union collapsed in the early 90’s.  At that time, Judit and her family’s knowledge and experience with Judaism was nil.

That’s where our overseas partner, the JDC – the American Joint Distribution Committee, our arm for providing rescue, relief and renewal for Jews around the world – stepped in. Along with the Ronald S. Lauder Foundation, they started a remarkable summer camp in Svarvas, Hungary.

Today that camp has become the training ground for future Jewish leaders and the rebirth of Judaism. Judit is a glowing example of the rebuilding of a Jewish community, one nearly wiped out by the Holocaust and communism – both literally and figuratively – next month is she is marrying her camp sweetheart at Svarvas!

JCF delegation at the U.S. Embassy in Vilnius, Lithuania

Less than 3 weeks ago, along with nine others, I had the privilege of traveling to Budapest, Riga and Vilnius to see what outstanding work the JDC does on our behalf. While there, one of the most moving experiences visits was the Shabbat dinner we shared with Judit and other leaders of Svarsas. In a Budapest restaurant, together we sang Shalom Aleichem, recited Kiddush and blessed the young adults. Thanks to your support and the power of community, our global Jewish peoplehood is growing in a ruach and light unimaginable just 20 years ago.

It’s all about your gift to Federation and for that I am grateful.